The problem with "Perfectionism"

To begin from the outset, being "perfect" does not exist. Perfectionism is defined as, "a disposition to regard anything short of perfection as unacceptable." Many individuals pay a painful price holding onto an idea of what it means to be perfect. How many times have we encountered people  who wanted to be "perfect" students? They consider straight A's to be an accurate barometer of their value in the world. For them, anything less than an A is a problem. They confuse excellence with perfection. Unfortunately, there is no gray area. It's either an A in the exam, course and/or semester or it is all for nothing. 

How many individuals have an idea of being the perfect parents? These individuals do not want to make any mistakes as it pertains to raising their children. Every decision has to be perfect. They do not want to hurt, disappoint or allow their children to feel pain. The reality is, parents are humans. Parents, like their children, have feelings and emotions. Sometimes parents will say or do something that will hurt their children's feelings. It's inevitable. It will happen. 

How about the "perfect"employers and/or employees? They make every attempt to not make mistakes. Every decision is imbued with anxiety. They question the moves they make because they don't want to be seen as incapable or incompetent.

Why do doctors have to carry malpractice insurance? Even with their years of experience and training, they are involved in a practice. They practice medicine. Lawyers practice law. They too, face the possibility of making mistakes in their work. Many are excellent, not perfect.

The problem with "perfectionism" lies in the fact, that being perfect in any aspect of our lives, is not possible. Maybe what some individuals pursue is excellence. To be excellent means that there is a willingness to accept the successes AND failures in the process of becoming and/or doing whatever we focus on, at a highly skilled level. 

Whatever it is that you pursue, do so confidently, knowing that part of the process involves possibility of making mistakes. As such, it is very possible to be an excellent student, parent, doctor or lawyer. How less burdensome would it feel to pursue excellence over perfection? Only if there were a perfect answer. But we know that there aren't any.